Local businesses appreciate business from marginalized customers
Posted on Aug 09, 2012 in Features
Witness of Jehovah! It has been a slow news cycle these last few weeks. I know this because a handful of fratty hicks and smelly hippies squared off in front of the Five Points Chick-fil-A and every news van in the city was there ready to capture the riveting protest and broadcast it to the bored citizens of Birmingham.
I don’t get it. I know I am not the only one who doesn’t quite grasp the gravity of this gay marriage kerfuffle that was brought about by the Chick-fil-A head hauncho Dan Cathy. He stated that neither he nor the company approves of gay marriage. Wow! Groundbreaking news out of one of the most notoriously pious corporations in America.
To the rag-tag group of protesters holding up signs saying things like “Eat More Gay” or whatever I would say the best way to get their point across is to go and support local businesses.
I spoke with Leisa Bunn, co-owner of Cosmo’s Pizza, a Five-Points staple for over 25 years, to get a feel for what local business owners are saying about the gay chicken wars.
“I was trying to go to Chick-fil-A that day to eat, but I couldn’t even get in the door. I don’t get it. Everyone is entitled to their beliefs. It’s amazing how much people have let his [Dan Cathy] influence them,” Bunn said.
Unlike the gay-hating chicken giant, local businesses not only love and appreciate any customer but also rely on them to keep the doors open. You can almost taste the desperation in their food.
“Owning a business is a wild and crazy ride, but as for the customers, gay or straight, we love them all,” Bunn said.
All my friends were asking what I thought about this gay chicken war. Really and truly I think it as trivial as forgetting to put the toilet seat down. Either way, at the end of the day, both corporations and toilets alike are full of crap.
However, I did find it amusing that throngs of gay-hating bubbas drove for hours just to support Chick-fil-A and their arbitrary appreciation day. Ok, you don’t approve of gay marriage, but the question is do you disapprove so much you drop what you are doing just to go get a #5 12-pack of nuggets and a lemonade because they reminded you that a Christian corporation doesn’t approve of gay marriage? You sir have done your part to put those gays in their place.
It comes as no shock that since Chick-fil-A moved into the Five-Points area several months ago it has had some negative effect on local business. What with their stadium-sized parking lot that is never more than halfway full and their neo-Nazi parking policy it’s a wonder people can still find a place to park in Southside. And that’s not even mentioning the negative effect it has had on local revenue.
Let’s just agree that holding up signs is as trivial as the anti-gay comments themselves. And if their stance on gay marriage has that much effect on you that you refuse to eat more chicken, try eating more local. Business owners like Leisa Bunn would greatly appreciate it.
“Come to Cosmo’s,” she said “We love gay people.”